UC Berkeley freshman Derek Low created this entire hands-free system for his dorm called Berkeley Ridiculously Automated Dorm (or simply 'BRAD').

This thing has everything from a romance setting to an emergency party button (which obviously he needs neither of those things but it's a cool gesture).The school just caught word of the improvements after he made some video about BRAD that went viral, and are checking to see if his system is up to code for the Berkeley dorms. Here's his video.

Look, this is dope and clearly in the area of general mechanical (and probably overall) intelligence, you outshine me like a blow torch next to a glow stick; but in the area of pants-dropping-charm, let me lend you my expertise assure you that the Lion King soundtrack isn't the playlist you want programmed for the 'romance' setting. I know it's Elton John and it's a damn fine song, but I'm guessing you're not trying to woo any 50 year old women, so stick to like some moombahton or anything that wasn't in a Disney movie or reminds people of their parents/grandparents.

Also, make sure you've got the remote close by for whenever you want to use that because if anyone ever said 'romance setting' out loud that would make me feel OD corny, and that's not how you want to make the ladies feel when you're trying to get it in.

Anyhow, my only real question here (other than why you had to use that stupid song that everyone uses in their product videos [why Derek, why?]) is why the hell are you in college? Have you learned nothing from the Larry Ellison commencement speech to the Yale class of 2000? He wasn't giving that speech to the dumb asses out there like myself who need a college degree to get a job that pays be better than a drive through job at McDonalds, he was talking about the kids like you who are already mad smart.

This whole BRAD thing? You did that. I bet you even did it in your free time, just for fun. You-don't-need-college. Just drop out right now and save yourself the 100 some G's you'd be paying to go to Berkeley, start your own business, and invest that shit into yourself. Just do that right now, make mad money, and then come and put it all into SUMO for giving you that amazing idea to begin with, ok?