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National > News

The Best Thing Subway Has Ever Sold

Thanks to a little thing called “the law,” drug dealers are forced to get creative with their slinging services. The most recent/hilarious example of this comes from a south Florida Subway employee who used her job as a sandwich artist as a cover for selling the ganj. Elizabeth Hunt, 47, was...

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Killer Cell Phones

Technology will be the death of us, or at least, so says the World Health Organization. They announced a few days ago that they have added the excessive use of cell phones to its list of potential carcinogens. The "potential" part means it may or may not give you brain cancer, their not really sure...

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Palin VS Fey

As already mentioned, Sarah Palin is an idiot. Add Fox News to the list.  During a news broadcast yesterday morning, a Fox News anchor discussed various politicians out on campaign trails. When Palin was brought up, a picture of her appeared in the corner. Only catch, it wasn't Palin. It was...

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The Shaqtus Retires

Ladies and gentlemen, the fateful day has come and gone; Shaquille O'Neal has announced he is retiring.   The announcement came yesterday from the man himself via Twitter.  He kept it short and sweet, posting a video to his fans, letting them be the first to know.  You...

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Tornado Hits Massachusetts

By now you are well aware that at least two, possibly three tornados hit western Massachusetts yesterday as part of the worst  storm in recent memory.  The tornado struck down in Springfield killing at least 4 and injuring dozens.  The police and officials are asking...

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Jersey Shore Falling Apart

Gym, Tan, and the Law it seems. While filming the latest season of Jersey Shore in Italy, our favorite oompa loompa got into a car accident. Although the incident is being written off as a fender bender, Snookie was seen wandering around with a neck brace and the individuals in the car she hit were...

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Surgeons Reattach Leg...Backwards

Thirteen year old Dugan Smith had his leg surgically reattached, but the surgeons did it backwards. The most impressive part is that it was intentional, which is a great thing because can you picture that lawsuit?   Three years ago Smith discovered he had a large tumor in his leg that needed...

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Men Are The Cause of (almost) All Womens’ Insanity

In my opinion, guys suck…no offense, dudes. Actually, let me re-phrase that. When it comes to relationships, guys suck. No, I’m not a hardcore Feminist man-hater, I typically get along better with men than women. However, when it comes to men thinking that we are are emotional, unstable and insane...

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Stupid People Continue to Give Alaska a Bad Name

 Congratulations Sarah Palin, you are no longer the dumbest thing to come out of Wasilla, Alaska. * Earlier this week, members of Wasilla’s high school symphony were told they couldn’t perform ‘Bohemian Rhapsody,’ a song that they had been practicing for weeks, at the school’s graduation. The...

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You are Terminated!

It's happened Sumos! Pics of Arnies mistress have finally been released. Her name is Mildred Patricia Baena, 50 and was his housekeeper for 20 years. Arnold said he wanted to fire her after the affair but she threatened to go public with the affair. I think he was just scared people would laugh...

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